Let it go
"A fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent man overlooks an insult."Proverbs 12:16
My flight was canceled because of weather.
I'm standing at the airport ticket counter behind a woman, let's call her "Karen," who is all kinds of upset with the person trying to find her a seat on a new flight. The ticket agent was doing his best, spending an inordinate amount of time on possible itineraries, but nothing pleased Karen. Finally, the agent bottom-lined the best options and politely asked her for a decision.
However, the agent must have let the tiniest inkling of impatience leak out, because suddenly Karen went ballistic about the agent's "attitude."
"How dare he talk to me like that!" "Who's the customer here anyway?" "Does he know who I AM?"
OK - she didn't make that last statement, but I was ready for it! What she DID do was chase down a customer service supervisor and give him an earful about the "attitude" she just dealt with from the ticket agent. When the supervisor wasn't able to "fix" the problem, Karen was livid. Finally, after getting home, she started a letter writing campaign and spent weeks of her life trading nasty grams with the airline.
I know all of this because I'm friends with Karen.
I've walked down this path with her countless times before. Karen is the reason Customer Service Representatives have jobs, and she is probably the reason most CSRs hate their jobs.
Karen seems to live in a constant state of annoyance. Everyone "seems" out to get Karen and to make her life more challenging and difficult. Her days are filled with stories of inconvenience and injustice; drama seems to be her closest friend.
Do you know people like that? Don't they just wear you out? Don't you just want to scream at them, "LET IT GO!!"
When I watch Karen's antics, it's easy to see how self-centered and destructive her behavior is to relationships. No one enjoys "fragile" friends who can't overlook even inadvertent slights. Instead, we prefer people who are laid back enough to overlook perceived (or real) insults in the name of enjoying relationships.
Of course, I like to think my behavior is nowhere close to Karen's, but then I remember a grudge I've been nursing for a few weeks. Or I recall how I "over-communicated" my displeasure at the office when I felt put out. Then there was my trip to New York last week where I seemed to be in a perpetual state of annoyance...
When I'm brave enough to look in the mirror, I can see how I have some of Karen's foolishness in me.
I need to remember the truth of the ancient Hebrew proverb; the fool is annoyed at once, but it is prudent (wise) for me to overlook an insult - - to let it go.
How do you let insults go?
I'll share ideas around that tomorrow...